Oh man what a week. I started out having a fairly busy schedule and then took a rest day so I could prepare for a busy week in New York! I was supposed to fly out on Thursday but there was a huge snow storm so my flight was canceled so I took the midnight flight out. I was so tired from getting up early that I literally went home and slept the entire day, then flew out that night. I was so sick when I boarded the plane and feeling over emotional, and yet I haven’t been emotional at all this entire pregnancy. I was so anxious, I felt sick, and I think I was having a hard time knowing I was leaving home.

Well boarded the plane and sat down, had a middle seat which was fine, but I did kindly warn the man next to me that I was pregnant and might have to use the restroom often! He just laughed and from there I tried to fall asleep so I could get my anxiety. My whole pregnancy I have felt so good in the sense of my anxiety. I have been mellow and calm and collected and then this flight changed it all. As we started to taxi, the tears came flooding in. I couldn’t hang. I also couldn’t figure out what was wrong so I just sat and cried. The two men next to me both offered me their seats to get better sleep and we’re so kind and while I declined they both checked on me a few more times. At this point it was about 1 am and kind you I rarely stay up past 10. I finally stopped crying and got my body to sleep, I didn’t sleep amazing but I slept and I was so grateful for that. I landed in New York at about 6:15 am, turbulence was nuts and I was not digging it, well baby wasn’t. I got so sick and just prayed I wasn’t going to have to run to the bathroom. After sleeping in my cab ride, I got to my hotel and fortunately had about 2 hours to sleep and rest before we started the day. It did wonders. Luckily after that I felt pretty good, and was able to be okay for the day. the shooting here has been so good for my soul and in many ways rejuvenated me. I am excited to work on some personal projects when I get back and really focus on my retreat planning.

I have a mild obsession with the bump. I just love it. It makes me happy and also I think gives me a physical reality that my baby is alive and growing. I just think after my miscarriages, any sign I can get gives me so much happiness. So while I post it and show it a lot and it might seem annoying, just know for me it means more than that. It means I’ve been able to carry my baby healthily for 15 weeks now. I’m so grateful. Which is also why I check the heart beat every day still! πŸ’πŸ»πŸ€°πŸ»

we saw the dr this week and he said my weight was down again, so I’m determined to really work on that. I’ve found that I like the ensure protein drinks, and was able to eat bolognese 3 times this week! So I’m getting a bit more protein and I’m sure it will help!

We find out in one week the gender of the baby and I can’t wait to share with you what it is! It has been in a ton of my dreams so it will interesting to see if I’m right!

baby size: lemon πŸ‹ πŸ‹πŸ‹πŸ‹πŸ‹

weight gain: at the doctors office this week I was still at 107 πŸ™„ so we are working on eating more

Sleep: slept okay. Had a hard time getting a good night sleep this week. Woke up a ton in the middle of the night, and barely slept past 7. Hoping it was just nerves of going out of town and I sleep better next week.

cravings: apples, otter pops, pasta bolognese, orange juice, apple juice, goldfish

feeling : I feel the most like myself that I have in months. Feels really good. I am loving shooting in New York and I feel alive. I also haven’t gotten to sick other then my flight and the early mornings. Still super hard for me to get up early and not feel sick. Night time hasn’t been amazing either, but oh well! No throwing up this week so I feel good.

Gender: I still say boy. πŸ‘ΆπŸ» I have had a few women say it looks like baby is low, granted I’m super early along but I’m gonna believe it. πŸ˜‚ we’ll see soon! Gender reveal in 1 week! So insane

Peak moment: feeling like myself again, and yet feeling like that part of me is now me and the baby. Sounds confusing but I feel very centered right now. Huge moment for me mentally and in my life.

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