This was the one thing I thought about the most before baby boy arrived. I was so determined to have it be a positive experience for Rooney and not freak her out. I had read about a million things and was worried we might not make the right choice, but also felt like we knew her well enough to know what type of things she would need help with when he arrived.
I had dozens of questions about whether I was going to give her a gift from him, were we going to let her even hold him, was Trent going to be holding him when she walked in and ultimately after really thinking about it and knowing her so well this is what I decided to do.
When we had Rooney, I told everyone, all family included, that they couldn’t come see him until she met him. I was determined that she was going to be the first person to love on him and build that bond, so we had about 9 hours before she came, which honestly was huge. I felt like I had time to bond with him and get to know him before she arrived and then I wasn’t worried or acting weird when she walked in and held him. Now if I had had him in the AM, I still would have had her come, but I am just saying for our situation I thought it was great.
Before we left for the hospital, we kept telling Rooney we were going to meet baby brother and she would get to see him the next day. The following morning, Rooney arrived with our nanny Staci, and they had her wait in the hallway till Trent came and got her and gave her a hug. I had read it was important for mom to be holding the baby to present the baby or introduce him to the older child. She came and walked over and we let her take her time to get to know him and meet him. We didn’t push holding him or touching him or anything but yet she did all of those things. She wanted to sit by me and hold him and so we let her, and she showed really great approach from that first minute. We spent about 30 minute or so of her holding him and just getting to figure out what was going on. We had a little gift for her from Augie which was a book that was called MAMA and a ball. We gave them after she met him and she really did like them. I don’t think she really got that it was from Augie but getting something for her was enough to make her happy.
Remember to not push it. If your little one has no desire then even though it breaks your heart, don’t try to force it. I think all kids are different and react differently and all we can do as parents is support their feelings and emotions. They don’t even know why they feel certain ways but the reality is they feel that way.
After you do the introduction spend time with your oldest. Let them snuggle you and do things that are routine for you two. It was super important for us to spend sometime with me snuggling her and after I did that she didn’t show any resistance to little brother being in my arms ever.
I hope you enjoy seeing these images as the first time she met Augie. Such a huge day for us but I couldn’t have asked for anything more.
Images by Courtney Allphin